A Letter to My Tūpuna

Tena koe Nana,

It’s your little Auburn moko here. 

Thank you, Nana, for the beautiful red skirt and the blouse you bought me that Christmas. Moana got the green one. 

 Unexpected, given with love. It was the first time I realised that receiving something in love is beautiful and heart-warming.  So much of what I do today goes back to you. 

You make me believe that what I do with my children and mokopuna will live on after I pass. What will they take from me and want to instil in their little ones? 

I have sadness, Nana, and sometimes I do not know what to do with it. I count my blessings, but I am not always whole. My Wairua is cloudy. Where can I go, Nana? Who can help me? 

Thank you, Nana Tarati, for taking me home up north as often as you could. 

Waitangi celebrations and preparation. You were busy with what you love. 

Preparing for others, sometimes even the Queen.

I now realise your confidence.

 You were parallel with her. 

She was the white Queen of the Commonwealth, and you, Tarati, were the Queen of her people. You knew she came from a position of privilege.

 But she was no match for you. 

With your hands, you lived a rich life of creating, sustaining and caring for so many. You did this without anyone that I could see. 

Yet now I wonder, were your tūpuna with you? 

 Speaking to you, like you now, speak to me.

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