A Gift. A Loss. The Journey.

Photo by    Rhendi Rukmana    on    Unsplash

This piece was written by singer, sound healer and spiritual guide Carolin Nobles on her blog 'Consciousness.'

I know I can handle this and this experience has come here to serve me, teach me and shape me even more beautifully than ever before. Each day is a miraculous journey in this world, on this dance between worlds.

It feels like I have lost everything that I deeply cared for, but the truth is, I was set free. I have gained myself.

As I have written in the previous post, what I truly long for is the intimate connection with myself. This deep love, the path that I have started to walk, this shall deepen and become the core of my being.

This and my passion for music, for singing, for healing others. I am here to serve and become this pure vessel that brings through whatever is needed in that moment, to each person I encounter.

I have asked for a tough, intense ride and here it is, delivered to me.

When you lose someone you love it may feel like everything ends here.

Your world ends, your world crumbles to dust and you fall, you endlessly fall. But what I realized that night when I was in deep pain so deep I couldn’t breathe anymore, where I could not sleep, just cry a river of tears of grief - nobody can take that love I hold within away from me. I can still love that person, even if they are no longer in my world. They still exist, somewhere out there and I can still love them, deeply from my heart. 

This is what stays. It is not an attachment, not a love that wants to posess the other or hold them back - just a distant love in the background of you going on with your life. It is pure. And pure love will choose freedom. You honour the other for what they were to you and where they need to be.

So it is a final goodbye, but on the soul level, not so much. We’re all connected, no matter if we are dead or alive. At times I visit my grandparents or the other loved ones I have lost. Even people that are physically alive but living their new lives somewhere else on this planet. We laugh and smile and know, all is well. We know we are playing a divine game here and we will meet again in the next incarnation. With different roles and different lessons to learn.

May we all be gentle with ourselves in these intense times, and shall we always be gentle with ourselves always. For self-love is the path. The inner connection with ourselves is what we truly need. As this wound is healed and the energetic pathway cleared, we will manifest new people and relationships into our lives that serve us right where we are: One step further on the journey.

I feel like I have learned lots within a year, within a few hours and at the same time, I am a beginner. What do I truly know? Nothing. And this makes me smile. If it is not all so solid, not all so defined as I think it is, then there is space and freedom in this.

To a new day, a new step, a new life. 


Carolin Nobles - Singer, sound healer & spiritual guide | Wellington, New Zealand

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